This blog post brought to you by Serra (for the kickass public access show title) and Alice in Chains.
Okay, Jerry Cantrell, for those who don’t know, is one of the founding members, principal lyricist, guitarist, and sometime vocalist for Seattle grunge band, Alice in Chains. He also is a solo artist.
This is Jerry. (This pic was lifted from a source which did not give me permission to use it. )
Jerry was one of the reasons for my trip to New Orleans in October of 2007. I met him at the House of Blues and got an autograph. Jerry’s music and lyrics inspire me, which is why I’m working on beaded artwork representing the Alice in Chains logo, which is a ginormous sun. It’s very intricate and I figure if I can do this, I can pretty much accomplish anything, beaded, that is.
So, the dream. Nate and I were at a hotel and I knew I was there for a beading show, or something of that nature. I had a lot of new beading stuff. I also knew that Jerry was staying in the same hotel. I caught glimpses of him in the dream. Then, in true Nanner fashion, I forgot what room I was in. Yeah, I had four of those card thingies you use to get into your rooms now, but totally forgot what room I was in.
When I went to the checkout counter to see what room I was in, Jerry was behind the desk, playing with the telephones and the printer, feet propped up, looking rather bored. He came out from behind the counter and starts talking to me. No, I could not hear anything he said to me, nor anything I said to him, nothing. I didn’t even get a feeling as to what we were discussing.
He did have my Big Blue Book of Beading and walked away from me. Almost telepathically, I said, “Excuse me, that’s my book!” He shut the book with one hand (its a big book, too!) and turned around. When he handed me the book back, there was all kinds of new beading stuff on top of it. I took it with extreme gratitude. I went up the stairs, after eschewing the crazy peeps around the elevator, and found my room.
Nate was once again with me and I found my beading stuff again, outside of the wrong room, and took them to my room. So, that was the dream.
Most of the symbolism in the dream is about moving up, moving on, finding new ways to express myself, and the fear of wanting things to move along, but just not getting there fast enough because I always set unrealistice time frames for myself.
I think Jerry was symbolic of someone who has overcome (or at least works at overcoming) their own personal demons, someone who has lost a great deal in their life, regardless of status or wealth, and continues to create and attempts to move forward with their life and rise above. It helps that it was someone which I admire that slammed the book on the past and made a very strong statement about “out with the old, in the with the new.”
I’ve been working very hard at putting my life back in order and channeling my continued pain into creative outlets, even if it isn’t blogging. I’ve been in flux between the painful reminder of what I lost in the fire, not anything material mind you, but my precious felines, and a resurgence of my faith in an afterlife where I’ll be reunited with them, prayers to my family and friends who have crossed over to watch over them and my recently departed cousin, who crossed on the 28th (what is it with the 28th!), unrealistic fears that I’ll lose everything again, mixed with an unshakeable belief that this is my year and the time for tears is over.
I came out of 2007 stronger and with much more backbone than you can imagine, even though I no longer insist that the weight of the world be on my shoulders. (Hat tip to Metallica for that lyric.)
I can honestly say, this probably won’t be the year for blogging, but I will stop by as often as I can to see all of you and keep you informed of my progress on my other projects, with photos, of course.
And thanks to everyone who weighed in on whether to keep my “Christmas” tree or not (here and on MySpace). I kept it and it is now a Valentine’s Tree. I’ll post pics soon.