What?

November 6, 2007 at 10:24 pm (Attitude in Overdrive, Cats, Friends, Nate, Work)

Have you ever met someone and they give you such an attitude you wonder if you’ve met them before, wronged them in some egregious way, and just not remembered it? I had a guest like that today. The majority of my guests were absolutely fantastic today as we were slammin’ busy and none of them gave me a hard time about it. This particular lady didn’t either but I literally wanted to put the tray down and say, “What?

Dirty looks, good Goddess! Look lady, it is totally not my fault you’re ugly. Bad genes, I guess, and that shirt you were wearing didn’t do much for you either. I still believe that attitude accounts for at least 50% of attraction. Trust me, I didn’t get laid last weekend either and I’m hot, friendly, and had a date for sex… and still didn’t get any. Gah!

One of my lawyer bosses once said, “Ugly chicks should be friendly because they have nothing else going for them. Hot chicks like you can get by with being bitchy simply because you’re hot and beautiful but ugly chicks… naw, they almost have to be nice.” I punched him in the arm, hard. Although in our society, he has a point.

Enough of that. Jack got his balls cut off today. He’s still in his crate as he’s still woozy and he’s not allowed out until tomorrow. I hate that but really, have you smelled male cat piss? *Gag* Poor Jack.

Nate asked me how they were going to do it and I told him they would make two small cuts below Jack’s scrotum, pop his little balls out, and slice them off. Nate made a face and said, “Ugh, I’m sure am glad you don’t have to do that to me.” LOL! I said, “Yeah, really. It was bad enough having you circumcised.”

Oh yeah, I walked right into that one. Blond to the bone.

“What’s that?”

Ah, the frank discussions between a mother and her son, especially when I had trouble remembering the term, “foreskin.” How could I? However, Nate now knows that he used to have foreskin and now he doesn’t and he doesn’t remember anything about it being removed. He also knows that all Jewish men are circumcised but some other men aren’t.

Jeff’s mother calls this, “TMI.” I call this, “Things he needs to know.”

Well, that was cringe worthy.

Did I mention I stepped on a piece of glass this morning and sliced a hole in my foot? It hurt and there was a trail of little (sometimes big) blood droplets from the bedroom to the bathroom to the computer room. Actually, I broke a pane of glass that was to go over one of my BSC collages, but I guess the cats knocked it over and when I got up to turn off the alarm, “Good Mornnnnnning, Vietnaaaam!” It hurt worse when I got in the shower. It’s hurting right now. Oh, well. So long as I don’t develop MRSA we be aiight.

One of our regulars saw me at the bar on Monday. I spoke to him by name. All I do when I walk up to his table is say hello, fill his water glass, ask if it will be one or two calamari, and his and his companion’s regular. The answer is normally yes. That would be water, keep it coming because he drinks a lot of it, two orders of calamari, two steak salads (mid rare for him and medium for his friend), drop check immediately after serving, and cash him out.

He asked, “What is your name?” I told him and he said, “Good, I want to be able to ask for you when I come in.” He had been served by Whiny that day. Don’t know what happened there. I don’t think she’s waited on him enough to know what his regular meal is and how much he hates being chatted with.

The State Supreme Court Justice who comes in likes a lot of lemon with his water and his steak (salad) should be well done, no pink. Sometimes he eats bread, sometimes not. And he always, always, always makes a freakin’ mess of the sugar caddy. Or you’ll find the empty sweetener packets on the floor along with some other trash. I think he empties his pockets when he sits down… I dunno.

A married couple comes in and he always gets the tuna appetizer first, then a bowl of the French onion soup, and tea. She gets tea and the chicken club salad. Lots of bread. Give him a tea to-go.

I call one of my regulars, “Sherbert,” and he and his wife call me, get this, “Peach.” This all started over a mango/peach/apricot shirt he was wearing one day. It was quite snazzy and I told him he should order the mango-lemongrass sorbet we have to go with it and I mentioned that some of my friends call me Peach. We had a great time and I was quite pleased that they asked me to wait on them the following evening (when I worked the 14 hour shift, yeah, it was their fault *wink*).

I really do love my job. And now that we’ve come full circle, I bid you, “Good night and good luck.”

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15 Comments

  1. kenju said,

    You have a great work place and I have no doubt that pretty soon, everyone who eats there will be asking for you. After all, I did!

  2. Trashman said,

    HEEELLLLLOOOOOO Sunshine. At first I thought you wrote good night and good fuck. LOL I must be tired.

  3. charmed said,

    I used to LOVE waiting tables. Some people are just made to do it, and they are the ones who make the good tips, and have the happiest customers….

  4. Celti said,

    *smooches the peach*

  5. Vince said,

    I always laugh at people who always get the same thing every time they go out. Not that it’s bad or anything, I just think variety is better. I’m all for frequenting a good place to eat with a hot blond peachy waitress to serve me, but let’s sample the menu.

    I would agree that guys will put up with a lot with a good looking chick. But guys will put up with a lot more to get laid, ugly or no.

  6. Michael said,

    After your conversation with Nate, I thought someone would order the “Bris”-ket. But that’s just the way my mind works.

  7. kenju said,

    Inanna, so you know about this woman? She reminds me so much of you…..LOL and she lives in Chas.

    http://daswede.blogspot.com/2007/11/stumbling-into-slumber-party.html

  8. LisaBinDaCity said,

    Glad you’re loving your job!!!

    As for TMI, I definitely subscribe to that theory 😉

    Take care of yourself, Missy!

  9. brightonandbear said,

    I hope you are a reader of waiterrant, you would love it!!

  10. brightonandbear said,

    And no, that’s not TMI, that is info about HIM!!

  11. Tina said,

    Kudos to Jack! He will be MUCH happier! That is hysterical that Nate said that.

  12. se7en said,

    Sounds like your job agrees with you, and you with it. That’s always a good thing!

    Kudos to you on telling Nate what he needs to know, though I’m sure it must have been a bit uncomfortable LOL

    8)

  13. Jammie J said,

    Well, everything happens at the time it’s supposed to, even ill-timed discussions about foreskins. Although, I think it would have been incredibly funny to make something up, because knowledge like that could’ve come in awfully handy when he’s a teenager and thinks he knows everything. Heh.

    Sounds like you enjoy working with the customers at your job, well, you enjoy observing them, their patterns and traits and who they are. 🙂 That’s a good thing.

  14. Old Horsetail Snake said,

    Aw, Peach, you’re just all-round good fun.

  15. Zelda said,

    Happy Thanksgiving, Nanner.

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