Double Entendre

August 1, 2006 at 9:50 pm (Uncategorized)

It’s ditty time!

On top of Oh Fuck,
all covered with sweat,
I lost my poor checkbook,
Now I’m swimming in debt.

My creditors are calling
they want to get paid
I told them to fuck off
and suck my left tit-tay

My day started off much like yesterdays, except I had AZ on the phone to bitch to. I had TM-ed him last night (that mean “text messaged” you dirty pervs), and then he called me about 20 minutes later but I was already in bed and didn’t hear the phone. So, I TM-ed him this morning and I had barely put the phone down when he rang me back. Then someone came in the studio (at the ungodly hour of 6:45 or so) and he had to go, then he had a remote, then he had to go stand in line with the other 2500 people who were trying to meet the Workers’ Comp deadline and it was 94 in the shade, 108 in direct sunlight, with 47% humidity. I TM-ed him a dirty ditty, not the same ditty as above, but haven’t heard from him.

Now you want to know the dirty ditty don’t you? Well, it’s a play on words for the Workers’ Compensation fund insurance underwriter who has a monopoly in this fair state of mine. It’s called Brickstreet but we call them “Prickstreet.” And AZ, ya know, he kinda got a wee bit peeved at said insurance underwriter and sort of made a T-shirt with the “Prickstreet” slogan on it, and now I’m wondering if he is in jail. Anyway, the ditty says, “Prickstreet, Prickstreet, you’re our friend, if you can’t fuck us, no one can!” That would be a triple play on words. Actually, that would be more like a play on words, a double entendre, and a hidden meaning. I wish I got points for this shit.

I’ve been working on Regan’s bridal necklace. I was working diligently today when suddenly, OUCH, my hand cramped. Both of my hands are sore. My right one is really sore. Shut up. This is not a time for double entendres and filthy jokes. This is SERIOUS! I make my living with my hands. This just keeps getting better. I suppose it’s better than saying I make my living with my mouth. Not that I couldn’t make a living with my mouth, I just don’t.

Where was I? Oh, yeah, my hands. It could be from holding a brooch I was making the other night since I had to grip it tightly while I whittled away at the foundation to keep it from showing. I think I did all right. Actually, this is a double entendre piece, meaning, it will have a pin AND a bail backing, so it may be worn as both a pendant and a brooch, cuz that’s how I roll.

I was going to post some pics but blogger wants to be a bitch. Maybe tomorrow.

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