INANNA 103 + 1 *UPDATED*

November 10, 2004 at 10:35 am (Uncategorized)

I regret to inform you that I will be MIA for a few days. Yes, I am behind on my NaNoWriMo and must redouble my efforts… plus I’m afraid Leese is going to hurt me if I don’t post the next part of my novel. I made a necklace for AJ’s daughter as well. I made it now so he would be on my mind as he and his family face another difficult time. Please keep them in your thoughts. I leave you with 103 things about me. Some you know, some you don’t.

1. I’m a slob but if I’m in a relationship I’m much more willing to do something about it.

2. I almost have to have an orgasm before I go to sleep, with or without someone.

3. I’ve never had a boyfriend who could match my sexual voracity.

4. When I signed up on Eharmony, they couldn’t find a match within 300 miles. This totally bummed me out. Then I went out and got laid.

5. The wicked side of me loves the fact I’m intense, passionate and intimidating. It weeds out the wimps.

6. The soft side of me thinks I should tone down, then the wicked side knocks her upside the head and tells her not to be such a wimp.

7. I will purposely try to scare men with my aggressiveness. It weeds out the wimps.

8. My friends know I’m really a big sweetheart as long as you’re not on my bad side.

9. I have a very forgiving heart.

10. If a man doesn’t believe he is worthy of me, he isn’t.

11. One of my ex-boyfriends made fun of my sexual appetite. I hate him to this day for that.

12. Nate’s dad once told me he didn’t like big-breasted women. I said, “Define ‘big-breasted’”
He said, “yours.” I’ll never forgive him for that. But I did forgive myself for being self-conscious about it for months afterwards, right about the time I wised up and realized he cut me down to keep me under his control.

13. I’m loyal to a fault. I once swore off sex for two years because the man I was in love with wouldn’t have sex with me but it still felt like cheating. I got over it.

14. My favorite foreplay activity is kissing, pressed length to length nude.

15. My second favorite is going down on him.

16. My third is him kissing my shoulders.

17. Any man who kisses my head, forehead, etc. has seriously moved up on the “you will get laid” scale.

18. I grow my hair long because it makes me feel more feminine.

19. I also grow it because I like for men to plunge their hands into it and pull it and tug it during every sexual activity.

20. If my mother actually could confirm half the stuff she thinks I’ve done in my life, she would burst into tears at what an immoral hellion she has raised, based on her standards of course.

21. The first four men I ever slept with had the same first initial… two of them had the same name. The next three had the same initial, but different than the first four.

22. Two men had very unusual names… one was named after a country, another, after a part of a particular flower.

23. Yes, I have been fucked on an office desk of my local government. He was one of the worst lays I ever had, specifically because it was a mercy fuck to get him to leave me alone.

24. I was 20 years and four months (minus one day) old when I had sex the first time. It was unimpressive.

25. The second guy was even more unimpressive. Since they had the same name, I took this as a sign to not fuck guys with that name.

26. The third guy was Red.

27. The fourth guy was Blackie.

28. Then Nate’s dad.

29. Then I went wild.

30. I have no doubt I could remember and actually find each and every guy I’ve ever been with if the occasion should rise, which it won’t because I’m good and clean that way.

31. I’ve been told I “feel” my way through life as opposed to being logical. I just wish I would “feel” a man up against me more often.

32. I’ve only picked up two men in a bar and slept with them. One was Blackie, the other was Red. Not sure if they count since I knew both of them before I saw them in the bar.

33. The number of men I’ve slept with who had girlfriends, were engaged, married or married but separated, takes quite a chunk out of my overall score.

34. I have a fear of commitment because I have a fear of abandonment. My brain thinks if it isn’t committed then it can’t be abandoned.

35. Only one guy I’ve slept with who had a girlfriend didn’t tell me before the deed but did afterwards. I was not happy. I would much rather know up front. He was accordingly dismissed.
36. I normally hate surprises, except things like what happened Saturday.

37. I’m very solitary and extremely picky over my personal space.

38. My mom laughed at me when I told her I was going to be in a musical because she didn’t believe I could sing good enough. I showed her.

39. Its difficult for me to sing a capella outside of the lowest part of my range. I’m not sure what my range is though. It’s a combination of everything in between upper tenor/lower contralto and soprano. I can hit low notes and on really good days, I can hit the high ones too but I have no idea about octaves or where I fit. I’ve always wanted to take voice lessons.

40. When I sang “American Pie” with a male friend, I had to take the low part because he couldn’t go deep enough.

41. This is why I prefer the blues.

42. I sing along with Sebastian Bach, Tommy Shaw and Jack Blades to improve my range.

43. If you don’t know who any of those guys are, you suck! You just suck!!

44. If you don’t know who Damn Yankees is, you suck again!

45. I have a rule that I only sleep with one guy per menstrual cycle. I instituted this rule because a girl I knew had three possible fathers for her child. I have only broken this rule once in 13 years.

46. The songs I listened to last night were: High Enough, Mystified, Come Again, Runaway and Tell Me How You Want It by Damn Yankees and Its My Life and One Wild Night by Bon Jovi. Over and over and over. I also listened to part of the Armeggedon Soundtrack – namely Remember Me by Journey and What Kind of Love Are You On? – by Aerosmith.

47. I’ve always wanted to sing in a band. I’ll even sing country.

48. The first song I ever did at karoake was “How You Remind Me” by Nickelback. I did it with a lawyer who was butchering it so I stepped in and helped him out.

49. I love 80’s hair bands. I’m contemplating buying “Very Best of Dokken” although the new “Saliva” is tempting. Red’s guitar style reminds me of George Lynch.

50. I know what happened to Ozzy Osbourne but every time I hear “Crazy Train,” I go, “What happened to Ozzy?” And then I mourn the loss of Randy Rhoades.

51. I met Ray Gillen once. He invited me backstage and I declined. He died of AIDS related complications 3 ½ years later. I thank God I said no.

52. The best concert I ever saw was Damn Yankees, Slaughter and Jackyl. I had a front row, center seat. Jack Blades was thisclose to me. It still gives me the willies. The good willies.

53. Metallica wasn’t bad either. Although I don’t see the difference in swapping music on Napster and going to the library and checking out books. Somebody bought it, now they’re sharing it… get over it.

54. The best thing about the Metallica show is its where I met my friend Joe.

55. I miss Joe.

56. I still have my stuffed animals from when I was a kid. I named all of them. My favorite was Ambrose the Frog.

57. I now have an uncle named Ambrose.

58. The first Disney movie I ever saw was “Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs.” I cried.

59. I think the Prince in “Beauty and the Beast” is the sexiest animated man ever. I would do him.

60. I watched Power Rangers with Nate because I thought the guys were hot.

61. I don’t care if someone doesn’t like me, I just want them to have a good reason. And if they
don’t have one, I’ll give them one.

62. The biggest dick I’ve ever seen in person belongs to one of my friends in Germany. Its easily 8 inches long and extremely thick. I couldn’t even begin to get my hand around it. I barely got it in my mouth. Due to circumstances beyond my control I wasn’t able to give it a good try out so, that’s another reason I’d like to go to Germany for Christmas. All I want for Christmas is my Astroglide….

63. The smallest was the size of Bic lighter.

64. When you ask me if something is wrong and I answer, then its minor.

65. If you ask and I say, “Nothing.” It’s a little more serious.

66. If you ask and I don’t say anything, its amassing.

67. If you ask and I sob and weep, it has reached critical mass.

68. If you ask about my feelings I might tell you… if you watch me, you’ll see them without asking. If you kiss me, you’ll feel them yourself.

69. I have an extremely long fuse temper wise. It gets shorter as I get older. Sometimes the intensity of my reactions scare even me.

70. “My Immortal” by Evanescence was written about me, at least it feels that way.

71. Yes, I’m terrified that Red will never call me and that I’ll never see him again, or it will be another ten years. I’ll never admit it though. 🙂

72. I’ve been known to become so angry I’m completely calm. I call it my “override” system.

73. The furthest I’ve ever driven for the purpose of getting laid was eight hours.

74. The furthest anyone has driven to be laid by me was six hours.

75. When in doubt, I always do it one more time.

76. My most thrilling car ride was when a friend did a 180 in the middle of the road to escape the locals chasing us out of town.

77. The second thrilling is when a girlfriend and I were heading off of her hill in the ritzy section of town, she lost control, shot the turn and ricocheted from one retaining wall to another, missing a BMW and a Mercedes in the process.

78. I have given a “road cone.”

79. My brother killed his first deer the day after my 13th birthday. I killed my first deer the day after my 31st.

80. I have a mad crush on a lawyer at another firm. I also have a crush on his boss.

81. If I had the opportunity to sleep with Johnny Depp, I’d ask him to show up in his Jack Sparrow outfit and talk dirty to me with his pirate tongue. Drink up me hearties, yo ho!!

82. I find Jack Nicholson sexy.

83. And Sean Connery.

84. I’ve had a crush on Harrison Ford since Star Wars.

85. In my first theater production, I was a madam.

86. In my second, I was a lover on a bench.

87. In my third, I was a ballroom dancer.

88. In my fourth, I was a Hungarian revolutionary, a reporter, a waitress, a slut in Bangkok, a technical director, a translator and a few I don’t remember. It was the musical “Chess.” I had 12 costume changes.

89. The director would tell us to “wrap your butts in velvet” when he wanted us to sit down.

90. I was assistant sound technician for “The Best Little Whorehouse in Texas.” I vowed next time, I would be a whore.

91. The last picture I ripped out of a magazine was last month when A&E was advertising their Biography series with a picture of Jon Bon Jovi in black jeans and nothing else. He’s sexier now than he ever was before.

92. I’ve been a Bon Jovi fan since their debut album.

93. My friend Kevyn is such a Bon Jovi fan, he swears he would bear Jon’s child if he could… and he’s straight.

94. I liked Richie Sambora’s solo album, “Stranger In This Town,” better than Jon’s because it was more bluesy.

95. I’ve always wanted to have boudoir pictures made.

96. I’m learning to take a compliment because it irritated me that Lex wouldn’t take one from me.

97. At the same time, I don’t like sunshine being blown up my ass.

98. I also realize, beauty is subjective. When Red told me I was beautiful I asked him not lie to me. He said he wasn’t. I couldn’t imagine that he would think I was beautiful, because he’s so beautiful himself.

99. I know. This is my self-esteem problem and that little voice in my head that says I’m not good enough to deserve someone beautiful.

100. At least that voice has faded to an annoying stage whisper instead of the screaming fish wife it used to be.

101. One of my favorite movies is “Practical Magic.”

102. I try to wear the same body spray when with a man so he associates that smell particularly to me.

103. The onion still needs peeled.

+1 = 104. I’M VOTING FOR TRASHMAN IN 2008!!!!

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: