Gimme a KISS!!

October 16, 2004 at 7:33 am (Uncategorized)

Right about the time the puberty hormones began surging through my body, about the time I was kissing boys in the back of the room at the coat rack and about the time I found my Mom’s copy of Jacqueline Susann’s book “Once Is Not Enough,” a particular rock band had a hit song with “I Was Made For Lovin’ You.”

My brother had the album with the four members in make-up, flourescent lighting illuminating their pitch black hair. My brother was never really into music as much as I was and before long I had scurried away with the coveted vinyl and disappeared into the void of my room. The “Lovin'” song was good and it was played a lot but my favorite song was “Charisma,” sang by the bat-winged bassist.

Even at such a young age, perhaps it was the surging hormones, that song touched a part of my young body that I wouldn’t understand for a few more years. The Demon’s voice was melodic and sexy.

Is it my fortune or my fame
Is it my money or my name
Is it my personality
Or just my sexuality, yeah, yeah
What is my charisma
What is my charisma, yeah

Is it my body or my brain
Do I drive you insane, ha
Is it the power of my touch
Do you need me too much, too much, too much

As I got older I realized that The Demon was, with the right kind of emotion behind his words and a hint of danger, slowly and passionately psychologically fucking every woman who heard that song. Yes, Yes, Yes, Gene Simmons is at the TOP of the MEN I’D LOVE TO FUCK list. It has nothing to do with his tongue, although that is a bonus. Once they ditched the make-up and one could observe his expressions, it made it that much more significant. And Gene is someone who speaks with his eyes. I like that.

And yes, it is that hint of danger that makes it sooo thrilling and sexy. Not that there weren’t other excellent tunes, like “Magic Touch,” “Dirty Livin’,” and “Sure Know Something,” which made an awesome acoustic tune on MTV’s Unplugged, but “Charisma” is, and will remain, my all time favorite KISS song.

Not only that, but my absolute favorite memory of my Mom and I happened at a KISS concert. Yes, my mom and I went to see KISS together. What was I thinking??? It was the Psycho Circus tour, which any KISS fan knows was the reunion of the original four members after almost 20 years. I had purchased tickets for myself and a friend and her husband who would be coming in from Maryland. At the last minute they had to cancel their travel plans and my Mom said she would like to go. What could I say?

Just to clarify… my mom has slept with one man in her life. She has never smoked a cigarette, much less a joint. She has had very, very few encounters with alcohol and has never been drunk. And she’s at a KISS concert, upper balcony seating, with a bird’s eye view of the stage and those huge video screens.

The first thing that happened when the lights went down is the three teenagers in front of us fired one up. My mom starts waving the smoke away with some kind of paper she’s brought in with her, completely ruining the contact buzz I was hoping to get. KISS hits the stage and they pop up larger than life on the screens.

Luckily, instead of having those bulky, cumbersome shoulder cams, the video techs were outfitted with nifty hand-held cameras, just perfect to fit underneath Gene’s bass… with those tight leather pants, gyrating to the beat…. A roaring builds within me as hormones and blood and who knows what else, floods my system, watching him. Among the roaring, both of the crowd and within me, I remember… Charisma… and that slow psychological fuc…. OOOUCH! My mom has latched onto my arm with both hands.

“OH MY GOD!!! DO YOU SEE THAT!?! DO YOU SEE THAT!?!” What Mom? The perfect outline of Gene Simmons’s dick prominently displayed through tight leather pants on a huge video screen… geeee, really??? I didn’t see that! Thanks for interrupting that incredible sexual fantasy I was about to embark on. Stop pointing Mom, you always told me that was rude.

I’m not sure if she was appalled or excited or a little of both, and I really don’t want to know. I know what I was thinking and that’s enough.

In case you haven’t figured it out, the Album of the Day is:

DYNASTY – KISS (Released 1979)

There is no book of the day, hell I just wrote one! I slipped in the title of another KISS song above without quotations … do you know what it is?

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4 Comments

  1. Cootera said,

    LOL!! I’m just picturing you at the KISS concert with yer mum!! Heh heh heh… When you were describing her pointing to Gene Simmons’ package, it reminded me of a time in high school when I was watching MTV on the big screen at my mom’s house. Billy Squier was up there larger than life singing “Stroke Me” (and boy howdy did I want to!!) when my mom came in, watched awhile, then asked me, “Is that boy wearing a nut cup?” Killed my buzz, I’ll tell ya…

  2. Inanna said,

    UGH… Mothers, I tell ya. Yeaahhh… Billy Squire… mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

  3. Cattiva said,

    Man, I loved KISS, too. Have the Double Platinum album, yes on vinyl, that no one and I mean NO ONE is allowed to touch.

    The only concert my mother ever went to with me was Neil Diamond because she liked him. Oh I think she took me to John Denver, too. SHE wanted to see these people, I think I was her excuse to go.

    I’m still laughing at the thought of your mom at KISS. My mother (aka June Cleaver) would have had a seizure!

  4. Inanna said,

    Catt – I think my mom had a partial seizure based on the conflicting emotions of wondering if she should be BAD enough to enjoy such a animalistic display of another man’s phallus. It made no difference, I was bad enough for the both of us!

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